Plant Seeds of Kindess
Nothing bad ever comes from being kind. It won't shield you from being hurt or from others trying to take advantage of your kindness, but that is not your energy to hold or mend. Your energy is dependent on the seeds you plant.
If you plant seeds of hatred, fear or cynicism, you will grow plants that are selfish and steal energy and minerals from other plants. If you plant seeds of victimhood, you will grow plants that don't know how to take care of themselves, and will wither quickly. If you plant seeds of kindness, you will grow plants that are generous, beautiful, and take care of other plants around them.
When I was young, people always said how "nice" I was. And I didn't particularly like it when people described me that way. It felt like a patronizing word, as if they were saying that I was naive, a doormat, that there was something I lacked. And I tried to change that perception by building defenses, I chased challenges so that I could learn how to be "strong" instead of nice, I grew cynical and bitter about the people around me and their intentions. And I learned that nothing was getting better, in fact things kept getting harder until I couldn't hold it all together anymore and I broke down...or rather open.
I literally could not hold that energy anymore. I stopped pretending. I left a toxic marriage, I let go of relationships that were not serving me, I left a career that was depleting my energy, and I created space to plant new seeds. I didn't know what kind of seeds I was going to plant, I just started gathering seeds that spoke to me, that made me feel good, that were supportive and reliable. And what I discovered is that I was gathering seeds of kindness. Kind people, kind faces, kind words, kind thoughts. Not as a way to bypass the pain and sadness I felt over the relationships that didn't work out (I spent countless hours in therapy to try and make sense of it all), but because kindness simply felt better. Nothing bad seemed to come from kindness. And my life started getting better.
I found a partner that shared my outlook on life, I started developing friendships that were built on kindness, depth, and honesty, I found a career that supported me financially and emotionally, where I was valued and trusted, I built a beautiful blended family with healthy, conscientious, and emotionally aware kids who valued kindness above all, and I started listening to, valuing and trusting my own kindness.
I returned to the superpower that I was born with, a superpower that I spent decades trying to run from.
I watched a video this morning, that while incredibly painful to watch, reminded me again of the power of kindness. A woman and her husband had ordered Door Dash. The woman who showed up with their food was followed by ICE. The couple let her in. She was desperate, crying uncontrollably. They let her hide in their basement while ICE threatened the couple from outside, coming right up to the windows, pounding on the door demanding the woman come out, and intimidating them with hands on their guns.
The couple did not give in. They shielded this woman from harm and the horror that could have occurred if she was released into ICE custody. They demanded ICE produce a warrant signed by a judge, and eventually then men in masks drove away.
That is pure kindness, and courage. And it was one of the most beautiful things to see. People showing empathy and compassion to a woman who was in danger. Protecting her from harm.
That was a seed and it is spreading as I write. The woman who posted the video has 11,000 followers on Tik Tok.
Keep spreading kindness. It is the seed in your garden of health and wellness.